“Thoughts can be your best friends or your worst enemies.”-Matthieu Ricard
Training of mind for controlling your thoughts in a desired manner is just like any other subjective training just like playing a piano, riding a horse or learning to swim. You may have adequate potential and may do at least 10 % of the task in right manner but with predetermined training you may add rest of 90 %.
You are some total of your thoughts. Thoughts become things. Your good thoughts may lead you to your subjective success and bad thoughts may lead you to uncomfortable position and may invite stressful situation and you may feel insecure.
Your mind may be running with bunch of thoughts as following,
“ I will receive my card secret PIN, oh , I have not yet settled my password for my email. Due to heavy rush my transaction in the bank could not be done. I have not finished my assignment given by my boss. My four wheel not yet serviced. The clerk had very bad manner in Government office, I must complain to get my job done and so on.”
None of us are free from worries, anxiety, problems and desires. Your present state of affairs is never satisfactory. You always strive to achieve more and thoughts are struggling to wander in search of different ways and means to get more things to be done. You always try to be more and more comfortable and therefore thoughts will always try to be more and more striving in nature.
Meditate and observe thoughts
The best way to control your thoughts is the period at which your thoughts are at lowest flow. Prepare your body and mind by light exercises and sit in comfortable position in meditation to initiate control. Concentrate on breathing. Put your thoughts to symbolically at rest. Count your breathing in increasing and then in decreasing manner. After several counts the thoughts will stabilise at minimum intensity. Surrender you attitude to solve any one of your problems.
Share your thoughts to close friend
When you are in the company of good friend, you can spit out your thoughts. Your friend recognises your buried feelings and therefore acknowledges them. When you express your thoughts to your friend, the act will give you psychological relief.
Muhammad Ali has rightly said, “Friendship is the hardest thing in the world to explain. It’s not something you learn in school. But if you haven’t learned the meaning of friendship, you really haven’t learned anything.”
Having a “best friend” is one of life’s most precious gifts. That’s why it is said, “You need not open your heart in operation theatre with surgical instruments if your have opened it in front of your friend.”
Live in the present
Most of the time person is away from present time and wander in past or future, there by completely ignoring the importance of present. Initially, do not judge your thoughts, let them come and go smoothly. Welcome and do not hate bad thoughts.
Our existing culture has led us to strive and think about what we’re going to do next at all times. It has become very much difficult to stay in the present moment when we’re constantly bombarded with reminders, concerns, expectations, and distractions that fuel anxious thoughts. At this juncture, it can be helpful to turn off notifications, step away from computers, and put gadgets aside. Practicing mindfulness exercises like puzzles or simple mathematical sums may help you stay in the present and feel more in control of the present moment.
Divert your thoughts to another activity
Find the events that trigger difficult, disrupting, annoying and scaring thoughts. Reframe thoughts in positive manner. Recognise uncontrollable portion of thoughts. Eradicate all by diverting your mind to another healthy activity. Pick up your hobbies or sports keep yourself busy in such activities so that the subject thoughts are kept away from your mind. If the intensity is more severe, watch a movie or listen to a motivational audio so that you are energized. When you are back to work, cut back your multi-tasking activities. Postpone your tasks which are not urgent in nature.
Take action to address the thoughts
1. Meditate
The more you meditate the less you hesitate. Your regular practice of meditation will make your thinking process refined. You no longer fear when you meditate and therefore you have better emotional stability. The meditation is a mental break to your mind.
2. Accept and combat your fear with action
You will see the fear is not as bad as you you think it is. I was afraid of playing guitar but as I stared playing each piece of music in fragmented manner and later on connecting them in a single piece, my fear of playing eloped totally. You can not learn swimming by reading or watching a standard video on topic. You dare to jump first and take little risk.
3. Temporarily forget your goals
You are definitely going to achieve your goal but focus on action because the only action is going to make you reach to your desired outcome. So momentarily remove your idea from the mind what you are going to accomplish and just go for action. So delay your instant gratification and concentrate on action part.
4. Do not try to conquer world in a day
Go slow for your action and conquer step by step and avoid multi-tasking. I remember a disciple who was handed over a torch and given a task by his master to collect some books from nearest village in the dark evening. Disciple said to his master, “ Sir, how can I cover long distance in darkness when this torch is able to throw light for few yards only. The master explained to walk few yards up to which the torch threw light. And in this process he walked for a couple of miles and accomplished the task.
5. Success is reached through the path of failure.
Failure is stepping stone. More the failure more the stepping stones. Somebody asked Thomas Alva Edison, “ You failed 9999 times and ultimately invented bulb!”. Edison said, “ I have not failed but found 9999 ways by which bulb can not be invented!” Failures shape you in a vital way. It depends on you how you pursue.
Take Away
1. Your interpretation of thoughts is your reality.
2. Be captain of thought and never allow your thought to be your captain.